Thursday, October 13, 2005: An Afternoon With Mary Jane

Ok, so it ain't what it sounds like.   It's been years (um, 5+?) since I've been to the dentist, propertly speaking.  But now that I've got state-funded insurance, I figure, why not take advantage?  Though of course, when it comes to dentists, the "advantage" derived from each dollar spent - at least in the short term, hedonic sense - is always a little suspect.  In any case, I made a long-overdue appointment for a cleaning.  Or a "perio-scaling" as they apparently call it now.  And was informed that novocaine (or equivalent) was going to be necessary.  Because this cleaning would hurt like a sonofabitch.  And I believed it, because even the exam was a little tetchy. 

Anyway, the appointment was for 1pm.  Marcin gave me a ride, detouring from his own lunch.  Thanks, Marcin.  And Mary Jane was my dental hygenist.  Filling in for the regular lady, who I've never seen.  In any case, I was quite happy with Mary Jane, a nice woman from Dallas who made an exceptionally unpleasant process at least marginally bearable.  She shot me up real good with painkiller, then went to work with old-school scrapers, and this newfangled watershooting cleaner that was something like a sandblaster for teeth.  She was really enthusiastic about it, recommending floss, &c.  And I was polite to that.  But we had a good laugh over the effects of the numbing agent.  And she kindly went to grab a Polaroid and document me looking like a stroke victim.  Gaaaaaah.  After my 2 hours were up and half my mouth was clean, I dribbled Listerine all over myself (mixed with blood) thanked Mary Jane and left.  Dropped in the Reef for a seltzer to wash down some ibuprofen, then went to the antique store.  Where I bought a copy of "Your Rugged Constitution" (i.e., the First Amendment: "You give / You get") and a photogravure of the Chicago Exhibition, including the main hall, which featured prominently in Chris Ware's Jimmy Corrigan book.  Then back to work, where my mouth gradually regained feeling.  And then it ached.